Finally… some good news

For a while now I’ve been convinced that cancer has infiltrated my girl’s lungs and that it was only a matter of time before she succumbed to cancer. Why such negative feelings? Is it because all I’ve received since her diagnosis has mostly been bad news or at least a bad prognosis? Why am I then manifesting this feeling just waiting for the gloom and doom to further set in? I don’t know. I don’t want to be this way. In fact, I want to be eternally hopeful but that, too, seems ridiculous. 

The reason for my concern is because our walks have become shorter and shorter with Maggie seemingly struggling to breath with her incessant panting which can last for an hour or two post-walk. I’ve wondered if the cancer was eating away at her lung volume thereby making it difficult for oxygen to replenish her system. I finally decided I’d had enough. I needed to know. I called Armory Animal Hospital and spoke with Dr. Corey. He scheduled a chest x-ray later in the week (which was last Thursday). The last time we did x-rays with Dr. Corey we were able to get them done without sedation and both he and I were hoping that would be the case this time. 

On Thursday, Maggie and I showed up for the appointment. Dr. Corey brought us back to the x-ray room where he, his assistant and I were able to lift her onto the table and get the x-rays done on both sides without sedation. 

I got the call later in the day from Dr. Corey saying that, in fact, her lungs look clear! He wanted his colleague, Dr. Dwyer, to double check and he’s sent the x-rays off to Blue Pearl (oncology) to compare to December x-rays. Dr. Corey called again this morning to let me know that he had Dr. Dwyer look at the films and she agreed with his assessment. While they haven’t heard back yet from Blue Pearl they are both in agreement that her lungs are clear. This is amazing news! When I first heard the news on Thursday I wanted to cry with joy. I still do. 

But what’s causing all this panting? Dr. Corey and I spoke for a while about this. He’s thinking that it might be because her pain meds have been reduced to alleviate stress on her liver. For a few weeks, if not a month or so, I’ve only been giving her pain meds on the days we walk. He suggested giving the pain meds every day because she might just be a bit uncomfortable. This makes sense. Also, to his point, when it comes to her liver or her comfort, I’m going to choose her comfort. Beginning today I’ll start back with pain meds twice a day for about two weeks to see if I notice a difference. I’m also going to consider acupuncture and/or therapy in the form of an underwater treadmill. 

Here’s the thing, I’m going to do whatever I can for Maggie. We are going to start again with her cart training now that back to back work trips are over, now that I’m graduated from grad school (as of Friday), and now that I should (in theory) have a lot more weekend time to dedicate to this training. Fingers crossed! 

Anyway, I’ll end this blog post on a sweet story. On Sunday, I took Maggie up to the Cumberland Monastery. It’s got great walking trails and most dogs are off leash which (generally) means they are good with other dogs. As we were pulling in she started crying with excitement. She could not wait for me to park the car. As soon as I opened the door she flew out and was running all over the place. Sniffing this and that. Peeing on this and that. Wagging her tail. Ears perked, crisscrossing at the top.  We walked into the trail area and saw a familiar dog, Wally, who is a two-year-old border collie. He’s a very smart, sweet pup. As soon as he saw her he ran up and they started playing. I stopped to talk to Wally’s dad, John, for a short bit before continuing on our walk. About twenty minutes later, we rounded a trail when we saw Wally up ahead again. Both dogs saw each other and bounded towards one another. Then Wally decided he wanted to play hide and seek so he jumped off trail and started hiding behind logs and trees, lying in wait while Maggie bounded back and forth on the trail, play growling for him to come out. Then… just as Maggie was about to give up hope he’d spring out of hiding run directly towards her and then have her chase him back and forth and back and forth. They’d bark at each other running this way and that. I have not seen her this happy or playful since I can remember… certainly well before her surgery. She was running so fast and pivoting so fast that I was sure she might hurt herself, but she didn’t. She was in a state of pure, unadulterated joy. Finally, they’d both had enough, found a mud puddle and laid down. I wish I’d have taken a video or a picture but I just wanted to enjoy the moment. I wanted to see my girl happy and playful. I loved it. When we got home she was zonked out for the rest of the day and the following day. But I can tell you this… it was one of the most rewarding feelings seeing her that full of excitement and happiness. I can’t wait to meet Wally on the trail again.